Persistence in Prayer Will Bring You What You Need

Maybe you read about the University of Chicago freshmen who are taking literary classics and rewriting them in 20 or fewer 140-character tweets. They describe their writing style this way: “Imagine if Achilles had a Twitter account and an iPhone, and he was telling his story in real time.”

I’m thinking about doing that for our prayers. Maybe we would pray more if we saw prayer as something connected to our lives, like the tweets people send out. Except we would constantly be sending them out to God.

That’s what Jesus wants—persistent prayer. Luke 18:1 says “And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart.” Problem is we give up on prayer and we lose heart.

It’s easy to lose heart, isn’t it? This phrase can be translated “to faint, to be utterly spiritless, to be weary, exhausted.” Hurricanes. Economic collapse. Health issues. Relational break downs. Jesus understood that life can take its toll on people, even on those who follow him. His prescription is “always to pray and not lose heart.”

It’s easy to lose heart. And when we do, it’s easy to quit praying. We think we need to read another book or attend another seminar on prayer. We think we are doing something wrong, like we tweeted when we should have picked up the phone and called. But those who have been persistent in prayer understand that God’s silence is a common experience for all those who practice prayer.

The story Jesus tells is about a woman who gets what she needs from an unjust judge because she constantly pesters him with her requests. The point is clear: if an unjust judge will grant justice, won’t God give you what you need even more?

The counsel of Evagrius the Solitary (4th century Christian monk) is good to keep in mind:

Do not be distressed if you do not at once receive from God what you ask. He wishes to give you something better—to make you persevere in your prayer. For what is better than to enjoy the love of God and to be in communion with Him?

Those who have faith are the ones who pray through the silence. They are the ones who pray persistently. In their praying, they may not find the answers they think they need. But they will find the One they need.

And that is something to tweet about.

If You Want to be Great at Anything, You Have to Practice

My sons and I recently had a “boys’ night out.” It was pretty wild. Dinner at Chili’s and Bowling on $2 Tuesday. I suspected I’d do better at Chili’s since I eat regularly but don’t bowl frequently. I did. Nothing was left on my plate.

Some pins, however, were left on the bowling lanes. Imagine my surprise when I ended up with a score of 292. I was envisioning the PBA Tour until the boys pointed out that 292 was my combined score for two games. Too many “just missed it by that much” opportunities. And for some reason it frustrated me.

Strange, isn’t it, that we think we should do better at things we don’t do often? A recent study asked the question: “What makes someone great?” Why is Tiger Woods a great golfer or Warren Buffet a premier investor? Most think they have a natural gift for their area of expertise.

But that’s not what this study revealed. The good news is that we are not born with specific innate abilities towards one specific job. Instead, there are some things that must take place for “greatness” to surface. First, nobody is great without hard work. Second, the hard work needed comes through deliberate practice. And third, you have to put in the hard work of deliberate practice regularly rather than sporadically.

No wonder I clear out a plate of food better than I can a set of bowling pins.

Maybe you’ve noticed the same in your life. You seemed to pick up a skill or did well at something initially, but over time it seemed you stopped developing. Ever felt that way about God?

The good news is your relationship with God can improve with practice. When asked “Lord, teach us to pray . . .” (Luke 11:1), Jesus did not respond with: “Well, some just have innate abilities to pray while others do not.” Instead, he said, “When you pray, say . . .”

Then he taught them the basic strokes of prayer (see Matthew 6:9-13): how to praise him, seek his priorities, ask for his provision, find his pardon, run to his protection, and focus on his power.

When a bowler finds himself in the gutter too often, he goes back to the basics. And when you feel your prayers are misfiring, go back to the basics.

You may just need some practice.

Learn to Be Honest by Learning the Psalms

Ever wanted to be as honest as this guy on Sunday morning? His wife said, “Honey, get up. You’re going to be late for church.”
“I don’t want to go.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t like the people. They don’t like me.”
“That doesn’t matter. You have to go.”
“Give me three good reasons I should go.”
“O.K. One, I want you to go. Two, God wants you to go. And three, you’re the preacher.”

Ever felt that way? Or pity the young husband whose wife asks him, “Honey, does this dress make my hips look bigger?” And since it does and since she asked, he answers, “Yep. It does.” He learns early in marriage that if he really tells her what he is thinking the result can be a few nights on the sleeper sofa.

Finding that kind of honesty is not easy, is it? But sometimes you need a place where you can be who you are, say what you feel and be loved. God knew this was an issue for humans. That’s why he gave us the Psalms. The book of Psalms is a collection of prayers that for centuries have trained God’s people to pray comprehensive, honest prayers.

• There are “praise” prayers: “O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!” (Psalm 8:1).
• There are “life struggle prayers”: “O Lord, how many are my foes! Many are rising against me . . .” (Psalm 3:1).
• There are “lament” prayers: “O Lord, God of my salvation; I cry out day and night before you . . .” (Psalm 88:1). We cry because our world is broken. We cry because we are broken.
• Then there are “angry” prayers: “Blessed shall he be who takes your little ones and dashes them against the rock!” (Psalm 137:8-9) These words don’t seem to belong on the lips of God’s people, but there they are in a book designed to teach us to pray.

Why pray these prayers? You will find yourself giving away your struggles, your sorrows, and even your anger to the God who can take on your emotions and yet not sin. If you don’t learn to do this, the evil that provoked your feelings in the first place will overtake you.

Read a few Psalms a day. Let the words be your own. You will find yourself becoming more real. Honest.

Trust this One Thing for a Recharged Prayer Life

In our family’s distribution of household responsibilities, I keep track of the budget and my wife cooks.

Understand there is a reason behind this. My cooking resembles manna. Not because it is heavenly but because Karen and the kids look at what I prepare and say “what is it?” . . . which is what “manna” means.

In contrast to my cooking, my calculating resembles a well-ordered desk (not that I have ever had one personally). I relish the sense of accomplishment when all the figures line up just as they should. And, I am good at not spending money when we need to tighten our belts a bit.

Except when it comes to my kids. When they were smaller and so was our salary, Christmas would summon the annual pronouncement: “Let’s watch our spending this year.” Karen would merely smile and nod her head. She knew what was about to happen.

As Christmas advanced my resolve retreated. The boys would ask for the latest toys and I would buy them with the greatest joy. They asked confidently because they knew their father would listen.

The scene at St. Peter’s is quite different. Once every twenty-five years on Christmas Eve the Pope approaches the Porta Santa, or Holy Door. The door is sealed. He knocks on it three times with a silver hammer. The door collapses, most likely making any spectator nervous that the rest of St. Peter’s is as fragile as this door. The door leads not to a wealth of riches but only into other parts of the church.

Although our prayers should resemble that of our children’s requests at Christmastime, they are often more like the Christmas Eve scene at St. Peter’s. Seldom. Difficult to get through. Little promise on the other side.

Want to change your prayer life? Then trust what 1 John 5:14 declares: “And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us.” You can pray with confidence when you know what to ask and that God hears you.

Kids have that confidence. My boys know what I want to give. They know what I can give. So they ask. And because they are my children I hear them.

And because you are God’s child, he hears you. You don’t have to wait every twenty-five years. You don’t have to break down any doors. On the other side of asking is all you really need.

So start asking. God listens.

Family Unique—“Pulling in for Pit Stops Along the Journey”

From toddlers to teens to travel weary parents, the question is inevitable. “When are we going to stop?”
Depending on the driver the answer differs dramatically.

Some commandeer the driver’s seat like a general taking his troops to their target. There is only one objective and that is “to get there.” Nothing will stop them. Woe be to the small child with an equally small bladder who asks the question.

Other drivers are more gracious. They know the destination to be reached lies ahead on the horizon. But they also appreciate the need for pit stops along the way. Blessed is the child whose parent has adopted this mode of journeying. She asks the question with utmost confidence.

Jesus was more like the gracious driver. He knew the value of stopping, of pulling aside for some moments of rest, reflection and renewal. It was a value instilled in his life from his ancestors.

In the Old Testament we find a variety of times the Israelites would stop. Much like historical markers are placed along our roads, stones were erected as monuments to their faith journey and placed at the point significant experiences occurred. In other instances festivals were used to pause and celebrate and remember important events in their history.

But perhaps the most important “stop” Jesus adopted was Sabbath. A weekly rest from work and worries. The Hebrew word for “Sabbath” means “stop.” Were there road signs in the Israel of Jesus’ day, the word “Sabbath” would be placed on a red one telling travelers to not move any further. It would mean to look around and observe where they were and when it was safe to travel on.

Sabbath was intended for something similar. It is a weekly “pit stop” along life’s journey to reflect on where you are in view of where you are going.
Might you and your family use a pit stop right now? Like the “got to get there at all costs” driver, we move along from one point to the next without stopping and stretching or just taking a break. That kind of traveling takes its toll on all passengers.

That kind of life takes its toll on a family. Wise are the parents who plot their family’s journey with vision, values, and a strategy that includes stops along the way. Stops to measure how they are doing and what mid-course corrections might be needed from time to time.

Who knows? You may be the one ready to ask the question: “When are we going to stop?”

Family Unique—What GPS is Guiding Your Family?

Until John Harrison came along, navigation of ships was a guesstimate at best. Egyptian sailors never ventured far from the land. Geographic landmarks guided them.

Phoenician sailors shifted their eyes from the land to the skies and plotted their course by the North Star.

In 1100 CE the Chinese created the first magnetized needle compass.

But it was John Harrison who solved one of the biggest maritime problems in history. In 1714 the British government established the Board of Longitude and offered a reward of 20,000 pounds—about $6 million today—to anyone who could create a device that would provide longitude within a half-degree, or two minutes of time.

Some of the greatest minds in Europe accepted the challenge. But it took Harrison, a self-educated clockmaker, to create the chronometer. The chronometer became a standard stowaway on ships and men on the Seven Seas were able to find their way home without having to stop and ask for directions.

Today the chronometer is seldom used but is required on most vessels. What bumped it? The GPS–The Global Positioning System. Now if only a modern day John Harrison would invent a GPS for the family—a Genealogical Planning Strategy. Something that would give families a strategy for packing up their values and taking them with them from one location to another. Something that would impact their genealogy for years to come.

Jesus had one. He had a strategy for instilling various values in his disciples. For example:
• Multiplication—he chose and trained twelve who repeated the process.
• Dealing with Conflict—he led them straight into conflict and taught them how to handle it.
• Faith over Sight—he put them in a boat in the middle of a storm so they would turn to him.
• Simplicity—he sent them out with nothing. And they survived!

Do you value family time? Then plan it into your schedule. Generosity? Then give away presents at Christmas. (This will go well until one of your kids says, “What are you going to give away?” And he’s looking straight at your Nike Sasquatch Sumo 5000 Driver.) Faith? Then plan a mission experience where your family is outside its comfort zone.

Jesus created his GPS long before Harrison created his chronometer. The chronometer is seldom used today. In fact, Harrison’s original is in a museum, tucked away where you can look at it but it is not functional.

2000 years later, Jesus’ is still ticking.

Family Unique: Your Values Fuel Your Family Tank

The drive from Jackson, Mississippi to Mobile, Alabama was nothing spectacular. Three and a half hours. Two hundred miles. Just a jog in our journey from Abilene, Texas to Tampa, Florida where Mom’s home cooking beckoned us over the miles. But to get from I-20 to I-10 you had to make the drive between Jackson and Mobile.

The long drive got longer once when we hit that stretch in the middle of the night. We made the turn south at Jackson with half a tank of gas. So while others were sleeping, I tried not to. I was driving. Scott was snoring. And I kept a sleepy eye on the fuel gauge. (Why is it the needle takes so long to get to the half tank mark then drops like the stock market to the empty mark?)

About 50 miles outside of Mobile we were nearing the red zone on the fuel gauge. Scott woke up. I said, “Smell that?” “Smell what?” he asked. “The fumes!” “What fumes?” “The fumes we’re driving on.”

Next moment we were fuming at each other, envisioning what it would be like for two young guys to be pushing a ’78 Camaro through the Alabama outback in the dark.

Your family’s tank can run low too. The signs are similar. You drag through your days. You sputter at each other when you speak. Tension increases as pressure mounts. The life journey becomes rough and the ride bumpy.

Whereas vision gives your family direction, values fuel the family tank. Values are what you most want to be known for as a family. Values are your “to die for” principles.

Jesus had them. He valued prayer enough to rise early, go to a deserted place, and pray. He valued lost people enough to not care what others thought about who he hung out with. He valued unity enough to die for it.

Have any values you hold that strongly to? You need some. Try writing down four or five that you want your family to be known for. Make them easy to remember. And then start living them out.

By the way, we made the turn onto I-10, gasping and choking right into a truck stop. We pumped 15.97 gallons into a 16 gallon tank. I vowed that day that whenever my gas tank reached 1/4 of a tank I would stop and fill up.

You should do the same for your family. Trust me. You don’t want to get caught running on fumes.

Family Unique: Answer this Big Question and You’ll Answer the Smaller Ones

Last day of school. Clocking out at work. Locking up the store. The only thing on your plate is summer vacation and you’re ready to devour it.

The big question is: “Where are we going?” Because until you answer that question, you can’t answer the rest:

• What clothes should I pack? A jacket for the Rockies or board shorts for the Bahamas?
• What sights should I see? The Golden Gate Bridge or the Eiffel Tower?
• How much money do I need? A few bucks for a nearby beach or a “break the bank” budget for a lifetime adventure?

The way you answer those questions depends on how you answer the first.

The same is true for your family. The destination you plot for your family will determine the answers to the smaller questions along your life journey. Just as every family’s vacation plans are unique, so is your family unique. And for the best journey possible, you must begin by answering the question, “Where are we going?”

Joshua did. He uttered these famous words as his family settled in the Promised Land: “. . . choose this day whom you will serve . . . But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:14-15).

Joshua was not only a leader of a nation. He was the leader of a family. “Serving the Lord” would be his family direction that would guide them in everything they did.

Can you say the same? Or are you just winging it the best you can? Interestingly enough, we put more planning into the family vacation than we do into the family vocation. A vacation is the time you take a break from something, namely work. A vocation is the special function of an individual or group. It’s who you are, no matter where you are.

How do you discover your “family unique”? Here are three suggestions from Joshua.

1. Gather your family together. If you’re single . . . less scheduling. If you’re married, plan a date night. If the kids are old enough, include them.
2. Discuss the options. Joshua mentioned other “gods” that could be followed. You may want to discuss different things that are important to your family. Just like deciding vacation destinations, laying out the life options will help in this decision too.
3. Declare your decision. Finish the statement, “As for me and my house, we will . . .” However you finish it, declare it.

Someone is thinking, “It’s too late for me.” “My kids are grown” or “We are too far off course.” It’s never too late. Did you hear what Joshua said? “. . . choose this day . . .” Now is the time to decide. “Choose this day.”

When you do, you can begin packing your bags.

“Older Brother” Tendencies Can Keep You from Joining the Party

Charles Dickens once called this the “greatest short story ever written.” You know it as The Prodigal Son. That’s unfortunate because “son” is singular. We forget this is a story about two sons.

I know I did. In my early twenties I was serving as a youth minister in the first church I worked for. The responsibility of teaching the ladies class on Tuesday mornings was assigned to me.

I don’t know what awful thing I had done to be handed that job. The room was full of old ladies, all at least 45 years old and older. They liked having the young guy teaching them and I usually got a plate of brownies out of the gig, so it was a mutually rewarding time.

One particular day I was teaching this story, sharing the principle that when reading a parable of Jesus’ you should always find yourself in the story. In case these older women had difficulty grasping the concept, I walked them through the options:

• Father. “This represents God, so other than learning from his example, this is probably not who you will see yourself as in the story.”
• Younger Son. “Any of you who ‘sowed some wild oats’ in your younger days (if you can remember that far back) might fit in here.”

All the while I’m thinking, “That’s certainly not me. I’ve been a good guy that God is going to reward big time some day for his goodness.”

That’s when some old lady with purple hair raised her hand and said, “What about the older son?” That was a good question. Luke described him as angry, refusing to join the party, and expecting a reward for his goodness (cf. Luke 15:28-30).

As much as I hated to admit it, when I looked closer at the older son I saw myself. Some days I still do.

Maybe you do too. You might be an “older brother” if:

You get angry when life does not go as you wish.
You’ve got everything figured out and stand back and criticize.
Your good works are joyless
You think God owes you for your goodness.
You don’t care enough to go looking for those who are lost.

Jesus ends the story with the older brother still outside the party. The decision to come in was his to make. It’s yours too. Why not leave the “older brother syndrome” behind and choose to join the party with your Father?

You might find a plate of brownies waiting for you there.

You Have Neighbors Who Need You

Your neighbor called me this week.

Trust me, I fielded a number of phone calls. Already you’re thinking about Mr. Jones that lives on your left or Mrs. Smith that lives on your right.

The calls came from more than them. You’ll understand better in a bit. But for now just know that your neighbor called me and asked me to tell you this story.

A young lawyer asked Jesus “. . . who is my neighbor?” (Luke 10:29). He wanted to “justify” himself. Like the words of a page bumping right up to but not past the margins, he wanted to know exactly who it was he had to love so he would not have to bother with anyone else.

Jesus answered his question with a story. “A man was beaten and robbed and left for dead on the side of the road. Two religious people came by, one after the other. Each saw him, did not want to get involved, and left him there.

Finally, someone you would least expect came and took care of the man. He bandaged him up, took him to an inn, got him medical care and paid the cost.” Then Jesus asked, “Who was a neighbor to this man?”

It’s a short story that widened the margins on the lawyer’s definition of “neighbor.” In fact, it ran them off the page. A neighbor, according to Jesus, is anyone near us that needs us. And anyone we show mercy to becomes our neighbor.

The Samaritan showed himself to be a neighbor. And so did Chilobe Kalambo. (His story surfaced in a recent Houston Chronicle piece.) His bachelor party kicked off at 6 p.m. Instead of one last night of craziness and endless rounds of drinks, Chilobe and his friends struck out to search alleys and underpasses for the homeless. People others want to pass by.

One person he met had been homeless for more than ten years. The man said, ‘I haven’t had a hug from anyone in 14 years. Would you please give me a hug?’ So Chilobe did.” He knows the meaning of neighbor.

You can to. You can be a neighbor to the destitute. Or it may be to the person next door. It could be a cranky co-worker or a crusty senior citizen.

They all called this week. They knew if you heard this story you might get the right answer. They even hoped you might get the right question.

Because sometimes people near to us need us.